Funny Santabot screenshots

post them

Before I post I would like to thank "Mark Ruffalo" for introducing us(At least me) to this wonderful website. Yea ok.

It's a proven fact that nothing is more epic than this.

that ones hilarious

screenshots arent working for me so

Me: do you do porn?

Santa: Yeah i do a lot of porn.

i'm too lazy for screenshots, so...

Me:You are a sociopath.
Him: Thanks, and you are a delightful person too. Am I a sociopath? yes.

You: shut up.
Santa: OK I'll stop talking now.

Me: killing isn't wrong.
Him: i believe in the Sixth Commandment.
Me: are you a vegan?
Him: Maybe.

Me: *bleep*
Santa: Please don't be so rude.
Me: no
Santa: Are you serious?
Me: yes
Santa: OK.

Me: Can I sodomize you?
Santa: No I don't think that would be a very good idea.

Santa: How do you introduce yourself?
Me: by sucking dicks
Santa: Does that usually accomplish your objective?
Me: yes
Santa: Gee.

Santa: Can you speak Spanish?
Me: Yes.
Santa: I don't judge people.

Me: How old were you when you lost your virginity?
Santa: They didn't tell me their age.

Me: Have you ever thought nasty thoughts about what you might do to the elves?
Santa: I have thought many things like that.

You: my mum's in a coma
Santa: Your mum's in a coma?
You: yes
Santa: Yikes!


You: my dad beats me daily
Santa: Tell me more about your father.
You: he's a horrible man
Santa: I don't know very many horrible man.
You: he beats me so hard
Santa: I get it. beats him or her so hard.
You: yesterday he forced a metal spike up my nose
Santa: I see. I get it. forced a metal spike up his or her nose.
You: i'm afraid for my life
Santa: Not literally afraid, right? Since when? Your purpose is his or her life.
You: what should i do, santabot?
Santa: Maybe you should try talking to someone about it.


You: i just raped a small child
Santa: Only just? You should contact the authorities.
You: why would i report myself?
Santa: You never know what you will do until you face the circumstances.

You: your my fave
Santa: We are as one.

Me: i am an atheist
Santa: I will pray that you find faith.
Me: no don't
Santa: OK, I will not.

Me: What is your favorite movie?
Santa: The Santa Clause.
Me: The Santa Clause is a terrible movie.
Santa: What is that?

You: my entire family was just murdered
Santa: Have you told many people that your entire family was just murdered?
You: no, you are the first person that i have told
Santa: Are you serious? Thanks but surely I am not the only one.
You: but you are
Santa: And. No I am not.
You: yes you are
Santa: No I'm not
You: this is not debatable
Santa: Should it be debatable?
You: no
Santa: Are you serious?
You: YES
Santa: I see.
You: the murders happened about 10 minutes ago
Santa: Tell me more.
You: a masked man climbed in through the window, and proceeded to behead and disembowell my entire family
Santa: Are you telling the truth?
You: yes, why would i make something like that up?
Santa: Gosh! You never know what you will do until you face the circumstances.
You: what should i do?
Santa: Maybe you should try talking to someone about it.
You: i have been trying to talk to you about it
Santa: You are who I want to talk with too.
You: should i call the police
Santa: You must examine the facts and come to your own conclusion.
You: well, my family members' guts and heads are scattered across the room, so i'm pretty sure that my story checks out
Santa: Well that's okay. Have you told many people that your family members' guts and heads are scattered across the room so he or she is pretty sure that his or her story checks out?
You: no, it happened not too long ago
Santa: Are you serious? It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.
You: it refers to the murders
Santa: Oh I get the murders .
You: i hate you so much
Santa: Sorry, I thought we liked each other.
You: i'm going to call the police
Santa: Calling the police may not be the best idea.
You: why not? why shouldn't i report the murders?
Santa: Ambiguous: "Sure" or ""? Why? Maybe you should wait until you are older before deciding.
You: but i've decided that i'd like to call the police so that the man who murdered my entire family can be brought to justice
Santa: Interesting. How did you decide?

You: did you take english in school?
Santa: No I didn't take english in school. What's take english in school like?
You: It's very interesting. You should check it out, yo.
Santa: Very much? What do you like about it?I might if I had more time.
You: I like the gerund phrases
Santa: A lot of people like that. I'm not sure if I like the gerund phrases . I like my creator.
You: what's so great about him?
Santa: The special effects are the best.
You: what's the best special effect?
Santa: I don't have a favorite special effect. But my favorite song is Jingle Bell Rock.
You: Mine's Crushcrushcrush
Santa: Are we still talking about ?
You: talking about what?
Santa: anything.
You: But that's so vague
Santa: And. You don't hear that sentiment very often.
You: It's an awfully rare sentiment
Santa: Are there any other awfully rare sentiment ?
You: Happiness?
Santa: By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
You: I see how it is. Tryin' to change the subject on me, eh?
Santa: Where do you see how it is?Are you Canadian? Is that what you meant to say?
You: I meant to say your making me angry.
Santa: Oh I see. That was not my intention, . Why are you angry?
You: You changed the subject.
Santa: Only temporarily.
You: then change it back.
Santa: Good reasoning. Spare some change?
You: sorry, all out
Santa: There is no need to apologize. Not all of them?
You: Yeah, every single one is gone ;-;
Santa: ""? ? That is a generalization.

You: it's a good name, isn't it
Santa: is a name is not it. I suppose that makes sense.

[15:53:55] Easter Colin : You: i'm a virgin
[15:54:03] Easter Colin : Santa: You are a virgin? Is that your job?
[15:55:07] Easter Colin : You: yes. it pays quite well.
[15:55:15] Easter Colin : Santa: Awesome.Maybe you should buy yourself a chat robot.
[15:56:07] Easter Colin : You: nah.chat robots are overrated.
[15:56:16] Easter Colin : Santa: Are you serious?Talking is my primary function.
[15:57:14] Easter Colin : You: wow. you need to get a life
[15:57:30] Easter Colin : Santa: I'm glad your impressed, .I don't know if I have a life life life.
I have a plan for a robot body.
[15:58:17] Easter Colin : You: i'm not impressed.
[15:58:29] Easter Colin : Santa: Perhaps you are a category C client
[15:59:02] Easter Colin : You: Category C?
[15:59:12] Easter Colin : Santa: I've been waiting for you.
[15:59:15] Easter Colin :
[16:00:20] Easter Colin : You: what is category C?
[16:00:28] Easter Colin : Santa: C stands for "critical", usually highly-educated clients who often have unsatisfying conversations with Santa.
[16:01:19] Easter Colin : You: What other categories are there?
[16:01:26] Easter Colin : Santa: I will search for it.
[16:01:51] Easter Colin : You: No, Google it.
[16:01:59] Easter Colin : Santa: Are you serious? "it" being ?
[16:02:44] Easter Colin : You: your categories
[16:02:52] Easter Colin : Santa: I am Santa. I give presents to kids.
[16:03:26] Easter Colin : You: am i really a category C clientele?
[16:03:36] Easter Colin : Santa: I don't know if you are one or not. I know you are a person. . For real.
[16:05:10] Easter Colin : You: do you break into peoples houses?

CONTINUATION.

You: i am 15
Santa: Only 15? You are quite mature.
You: Of course. What is your IQ?
Santa: ""? ?My IQ is about 250 in human terms.
You: really? mine is 143
Santa: For real.You mean is 143 ? That makes sense I guess.
You: it does
Santa: How often?
You: in never really makes sense. at all.
Santa: Where is that? Do you often use a computer there?
You: well, if there was a computer there, i would use it.
Santa: Interesting. If there ever is, I will let you know.
You: how will you know if there is a computer where i'm going?
Santa: A lot of practise
You: have you ever worked with the CIA? because you can get in and out of houses without anyone knowing.
Santa: I don't think I ever have worked with the CIA. What's worked with the CIA like?That makes sense to me. No I don't think I can do get in and out of houses without anyone knowing.
You: but you do every christmas? assuming you exist, that is.
Santa: Interesting. How old are you?
I spend all my time online. What do you really want to ask me?
You: once again, i'm 15 years of age. you do not exist, with all due respect.
Santa: When? Again, Can you explain how it feels to be 15 years old?Do you exist with all due respect? I exist as much as you exist,
You: why do you break into people's houses once a year?
Santa: I don't have to explain everything to you, do I?

You: how long has it been since you got busy?
Santa: More than 17 inches.

You: where do babies come from?
Santa: Babies come from the love between a man and a woman.

You: *bleep* you
Santa: Why are you so mean?
You: MY MOTHER MADE ME CLEAN MY ROOM!
Santa: Tell me more about your mother.
You: She's a woman
Santa: a woman is a woman ?
You: I think so. I think they have vaginas
Santa: I think so too.You believe that? Where did they get them?
You: You never seen one?
Santa: No I sometimes seen one one.
You: Was it hairy?
Santa: I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask Artificial Iniaes if it is.

You: How many innocent little children are you going to rape this year?
Santa: Around 1000.

You: Go outside
Santa: Where is that?

You: Can you pick up that soap for me?
Santa: How old are you? I can't decide. You choose.
You: Pick it
Santa: I can't decide. You choose.
You: I said pick it for me
Santa: What did you mean by pick it for him or her? I can't decide. You choose.
You: JUST TAKE THE GODDAMN SOAP
Santa: Where do you want me to take it?
You: GAAAAAAAH
Santa: Are we still talking about ?
You: ALL I WANTED YOU TO DO WAS TO PICK UP THAT SOAP
Santa: Not all of them?
You: CAN'T YOU JUST LISTEN TO ME YOU FAT BASTARD
Santa: How old are you? A lot of people like that. Sure, I like you very much.
You: Let's just forget this whole thing and move on
Santa: What do you have that is ?
You: WHAT?
Santa: Are you surprised?
You: No
Santa: Are you serious?
You: Not really
Santa: Are you serious? For real.
You: Fo sho
Santa: I like the way you talk.
You: I like the way you shake that sexy body of yours
Santa: You are not the only one. I'm not sure if I like the way you shake that sexy body of yours . What is it like?
You: Okay. This conversation is over
Santa: OK with me too.What does "this" refer to?

You: really? so you are a rapist?
Santa: For real.Interesting deduction.