Doctor Cosentino.

It was the middle of the night, dude. Doctor Joey Cosentino was in his lab, when a man burst through the door saying, "Dude, I need a couple new kidneys. Mine are failin'. Can I have someone else's? Like yours?" The doctor replied, "Yes." "Yay!" He called for his assistant, Brandon Agnew, and asked the man to sign a release form. He signed 'Brandon Lehman', and gave back the pad. Doctor Joey strapped him to a table, and Brandon gave him some anesthetic. Then Doctor Joey ripped out his kidneys and replaced them with his ex-girlfriend's, whom he kept in a cage. Then he started to sew him back up, when Brandon dropped the needle into his eye! Then Doctor Joey had to scold his assistant for killing himself, and, in the process, forgot to stitch up Brandon! This instantly killed him from air reaching his liver. Yeah.

Then a man escorted his friend inside, and asked if Doctor Joey could get a crayon the other man had forced inside him out. The dcotor had them both sign release forms, and they signed 'em 'Jake Adjutant' and 'Eifion Lewis'. Then Doctor Joey got a bicycle air pump and stuffed it in Eifion's ear, and pumped it hard. This blew Eifion's head to astronomical sizes AND got the crayon out! But he died from air hitting his brain. Jake had had it. "YOUR ASSISTANT MAY HAVE COMMITTED SUICIDE, AND ONE OF YOUR PATIENTS MAY HAVE DIED FROM YOUR CARELESSNESS, BUT THIS TIME YOU'VE GONE TOO FAR. HIS HEAD IS TOO HUGE. I DEMAND MY MONEY BACK." "No refunds." Then Jake slaughtered Doctor Joey with a toothpick, and walked valliantly to the computers, where he tripped on a ladybug and impaled himself on a testtube. Yeah.

THE END.

You're insane, aren't you?

youre wierd

no i'm not bwaaaaaaaaah

This deserves a grammy, best soundtrack for a story ever jake!